"Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But names will never harm me."
- English children's rhyme
So when I am 'on' and engaging fully in creating that life I love to live, I notice that the more I work and play to reach my goals, it is inevitable I will cross paths with others who think differently, including in my pickleball world where we are pioneers at this sport and there IS a lot of conflict happening as we build our sport and our programs.
As I think about some of the stresses I've encountered I realize: I can have a thick enough skin for this, even if I wince a bit each time I get the criticism.
Such is the price of living a 'full out' life I guess
I promise you: if you can see through the attempts by others to help - without taking their ideas or ire too seriously - you may be on to something. Something big or just something nice.
But it's okay too to put on the flack jacket I say! Or even walk away if you don't need it. It's also wise to teach your students and members appropriate 'on the court behavior' and use consequences if and when they break those guidelines.
Then again, here's a strategy you can use during those times when flack jackets, leaving or rules aren't available: that buzz word 'mindfulness' comes to this ol' noggin. Today I was teaching beginning principles in mindfulness to a client. One of the key tenets of mindfulness is the idea of feeling the emotion - whatever it is - and just noticing 'it', whatever that uncomfortable feeling is.
Or as another psychologist Dr. LuAnn Helms at University of Utah says, "Just because something someone says bothers you that doesn't make it abusive".
Those feelings may 'break' my mood for a minute, but then again, they don't usually sideline me by say, breaking my bones!
In fact, the more I summon my courage and 'live to die another day' it often times gets easier and easier to handle the verbal slings and arrows. They're just words.